STILL HERE...AND RUNNING THE RACE

It's been a strange, busy time the last month. I haven't been able to blog my devotions, and to be honest with you, it's a direct reflection of the fact that my time with the Father has been suffering. It's funny how we can become so caught up in the affairs of life that we don't even realize that we have skipped a meeting with Him. When I do realize that it has been a couple of days, I allow my flesh to reason the conviction away and promise to do better because I'm walking in grace and not legalism.

I am, I realize, operating under grace. But that is not an excuse to fall into disobedience. Grace is the nature of the Father in how He deals with me. To use that as a crutch to not walk in the light of what I know to be true is abuse. Yes, that may sound a bit harsh, but it is time we start calling sin, sin. To glaze over it is dishonor to our Lord.

A side effect of not walking in fellowship with the Father is how I recognize changes in relationships moving back to what they were before I got my head on straight. A little more edgy attitude, a little sharp in the responses, feeling more pressure from the outside, noticing that others are struggling a little more because I'm not praying for them or responding to them in a way that encourages and edifies. My role as a father and husband changes. I don't like that feeling. I want to be strong for my family. I want to be the encourager. I want to be the one that my boys and my wife can depend on.

All that said, I'm back in the swing of things. I'm learning to forgive myself and to keep pressing for the mark. Any long distance runner will tell you that it is an even stride that will get you to the finish.

That thought takes me back to the Olympics. I was watching the marthon runners. When the race started, there were those that took off and set a great distance between themselves and the pack. I remember sitting there thinking that this can't be much of an event if the leaders are so easily made so early. But as I watched, I found that those in the lead quickly tired and before long they were no longer in the lead...sometimes they were no longer even mentioned. As they settled into their run, I'm sure they all finished, but at that point, it was just about finishing, not winning. The runners that maintained a steady pace and knew when to press harder ended up in the lead. Don't get me wrong. I'm not necessarily interested in being the lead runner for everyone, but for my family I am. In someone's race I will be a runner that finishes. In my personal race, I want to be the pacesetter that pulls others to be better than they would be if they relaxed or gave up. I'm still here...and running the race.